How Are Women With Asperger’s Different, And Why Does It Matter?


How Are Women With Asperger's Different, And Why Does It Matter?

The unique qualities of women with Asperger’s are important for all to consider.

Evidence is emerging that women with Asperger’s syndrome think and act differently than men with Asperger’s. The difference is so pronounced that some experts are proposing a type of Asperger’s unique to women, referring to this distinct condition as the Female Autism Phenotype.


Although reference is made to autism, the participants in studies of this condition are generally women with higher functioning autism, more commonly known as Asperger’s. Thus, wherever they fall on the autism spectrum, from classic autism to Asperger’s, it appears that women are distinctly different from men, with important repercussions.

The gender differences in Asperger’s can be grouped into three main spheres:

  1. Women with Asperger’s tend to seek social engagement and have a greater capacity for traditional friendships than men with Asperger’s.
  2. Women are vulnerable to “internalizing” their problems, that is, keeping them private and hidden from others, focusing their problems inwards and subsequently experiencing them in the form of anxiety, depression and/or eating disorders. Men with Asperger’s, on the other hand, typically “externalize” their problems, directing them towards the external environment and acting them out, typically in the form of hyperactivity, impulsivity and inappropriate conduct.
  3. Women engage in fewer repetitive behaviors, interests, and activities than their male counterparts. They obsess less about favorite topics and are less insistent on repeating the same routines over and over.

Furthermore, there are indications that women with Asperger’s are particularly adept at “camouflaging” their social difficulties. From an early age, they prioritize fitting in to a greater degree than men. By observing others and mimicking what is normal, they work to learn, adopt and use “neurotypical” social skills, in effect masking their true nature in order to appear normal.

An important consequence of these characteristics is that women are at greater risk of having undetected Asperger’s than are men. By internalizing their problems and appearing sad, lonely or withdrawn rather than disruptive or troublesome, they fall below the radar of family, friends, and professionals. Because of their social motivation and better non-verbal communication, they are often diagnosed with mood or stress-related disorders, rather than Asperger’s. This is compounded by a frequent bias among professionals that women can’t have Asperger’s. As a result, women require more severe symptoms and a greater number of symptoms to meet the criteria for an Asperger’s diagnosis.

The costs of this bias and the resulting misdiagnoses are considerable. Rather than receiving care for Asperger’s, women are often stuck with the residuals of their internalizing tendencies, that is, anxiety, depression and general distress. Without a proper diagnosis, they have a more difficult time accessing the resources and support that would help them manage their challenges. They miss out on engaging with the adult Asperger’s community. More damaging, perhaps, they are often mischaracterized as lazy, incapable, and inadequate.

The challenges of being a woman with Asperger’s are not insignificant. Many are burdened by their repeated efforts to conceal their symptoms. They are confused about their true identity. Prioritizing fitting into “normal” society often results in being manipulated and mistreated by others, as well as ignored and marginalized.

The challenges of having Asperger’s in today’s society are magnified for women who have to contend with societal expectations that are odds with the specific characteristics of Asperger’s. Traditional female roles such as taking care of others, submitting to authority, being sensitive, gentle, and empathic are often incompatible with how these women wish to live their lives. Taking care to ensure they receive proper consideration, including an accurate diagnosis, is of utmost importance, to them, and to all of us.

Dr. Kenneth Roberson is an Asperger’s psychologist in San Francisco with over 30 years of experience. To ask a question or schedule an appointment, please call 415-922-1