August 7, 2019 at 8:52 pm #11176
While researching information on my lack of emotions, I found Asperger’s and CEN. Can we get a professional’s opinion on CEN? Is it real or just a marketing gimmick for an expensive online program?August 25, 2019 at 6:16 pm #11263
Nick, do you really need a professional opinion on whether childhood emotional neglect is real or not? I’ve never actually seen it pinpointed with “CEN” like you wrote, so did you read about it on a site that advertised a “treatment” for people who were emotionally neglected as children? If so, I can understand the question. But whether somebody is using “CEN” as a gimmick or not, I can assure you that – sadly – many children are emotionally neglected by their parental units, and it’s been the case since time began. I hope you find what you’re looking for.August 27, 2019 at 10:09 am #11267
Here is more information on CEN: the web site drjonicewebb.com describes CEN, has a link to a questionnaire, and to recovery training programs. The free program provides more information and a discount for the full program, which is quite expensive. Does such a program make sense for somebody with AS?January 1, 2020 at 4:29 pm #11449
You bring up a lot of good questions Nick. Let me try to provide some ideas to consider.
Your questions at some level become one of nature vs. nuture: genetics (AS) vs. raising (CEN). If you have been diagnosed with AS, whether or not CEN was there, AS will be there. It is part of who you are. The challenge is figuring out how to rub off the rough edges that the outside world experiences so you can be perceived as more “normal” and fit in.
If you haven’t been diagnosed with AS/ASD, and think you may be wired that way, I would strongly recommend you get tested by a professional. I did, at 55. For me it was one of the best decisions of my life, because it helped me better understand all the denseness, “blind spots”, miscommunications, and derision I have had happen over the years that didn’t make sense. A whole new set of puzzle pieces of Me started getting filled in and for the first time started making sense.
If you are diagnosed with AS/ASD, I would also strongly recommend that instead of the CEN course that you find a professional therapist who has AS/ASD experience. You need to see that person regularly and use your ongoing life experiences as educational/teaching moments. Those professionals exist but are not always easy to find. There are a lot more to support children than adults. I found one, and he has been incredibly helpful. It’s kind of like cracking a code, a code he already knows and sees even though I may not, and at times really don’t (at all). My therapist takes the time to help me understand what is going on in language I can understand, and then encourages me to change. It’s not always successful, but there is progress, and others can see it.
Dr. Roberson would be an excellent choice, but unfortunately I live too far away so I had to find someone else.
Even with the delay in response I hope this perspective helps you in your journey. May I encourage you to not give up, not give in, and keep trying to figure these communication things out. Take care.January 15, 2020 at 10:32 am #11455
Thank you for your thoughts. Since submitting my question I have worked through Ashley Stanford’s book on Asperger Syndrome and long-term relationships and concluded that mine was a relatively mild case. Currently I am working through her book on Troubleshooting Relationships. Since Ashley is a Techie like I am, her approach makes a lot of sense to me, however is more difficult for my NT wife. Just knowing about my condition puts our relationship in a different perspective, and this has helped dissolving a lot of resentment.
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